Belts {no brags}

{Disclaimer: this is not a brag post…this is hey I’ve been there, still here, go up and down with it, but know that there’s progress and know you can do it to if you’re in my same shoes.}

I am one of “those” who struggles with size.

I know my healthy weight & size for my body type, but life happens.

Getting married.

Having a baby.

Getting back on track.

Having another baby.

*ahem* aging.

Yes, I’m 27 years old and threw in the “a” word. Aging.

{Hence}

The things that made the pounds and inches come off pretty easily no longer work like they used to.

So I tried different diets and combinations of this and that and not eating this and drinking that and oh by the way do this 5 days a week, etc., etc., etc.

Then, I was at a point where I had to do something.

So “the talk” had to happen with my primary care physician.

The talk about weight & being in a healthier range.

Then the talk about what to do about it.

#gameplan

At this point, I’m getting closer to the healthy weight goal; but this brings in the issue of clothing.

Piece by piece, my clothes started to fit differently.

{praise Jesus}

Some of them have had to find new homes, some have needed adjusting, and some have needed a belt.

I have 1 belt for the actual purpose that a belt has.

I have had this 1 belt since I was in junior high.

Yep. This belt is brown leather from American Eagle. It’s one of the first things my mom ever let me get from American Eagle as a pre-teen.

Getting to shop at American Eagle at 12 years old to get ready for 7th grade was probably one of my favorite outings in the Texarkana Mall.

Brown leather. Laser cut outs. 7 notches. Gold “buckle.”

#ithoughiwascool #AEerrything

Throughout my school years, the belt stayed on the last laser cut out before the notches started because it wasn’t quite tight enough.

Those years of thinking I was the “fat friend,” and looking back as an adult realizing I couldn’t even tighten the belt enough using the notches makes me want to send a cookie or 3 to my teenage self.

So then as I got older, I had to use the first notch or 2 in college.

{my college self found those cookies…}

Then of course in college I hardly wore pants that required a belt.

{hello going to class in leggings & sweat pants…. every day}

During this season of life, the belt stayed mostly on the floor in my closet, in the bathroom floor, or in the bedroom floor– all depending on where a young Ellie would drag it to chew on the edges with her tiny puppy teeth.

In that season of life, that belt entertained my first ever puppy of my own.

The next time I needed that belt, I was older and had to use the 3rd or 4th notch.

Then the 5th when I was pregnant with Piper.

I used the 7th and last notch on the belt when I was pregnant with Everly.

On the morning of July 19, 2018 at 3:30am, I put on that trusty brown leather belt with my shorts to wear to the hospital to deliver our not-so-tiny precious into the world just a few hours later.

I used the 7th notch at almost exactly 9 months pregnant.

Even though I had every reason to use the very last notch on the belt, I didn’t like it.

So fast forward to the past summer when the slow melting of the baby weight came to its standstill, and with a 1 year old at my feet– that belt was still at the 6th or 7th notch.

We fast forward to the middle of November.

The weather here has become irritatingly cold.

Yep– irritatingly. Not chilly. Not “oh I need a jacket.”

Irritatingly— “Hey Husband, let me borrow that Carhartt hunting beanie with built in face mask for my moring duty.”

I was super proud that I bought a size smaller pants for school this year, but after having several activities and not being caught up on laundry before the cold weather hit— I had to pull out a few pairs from last year to wear this past week.

This means the belt came out too for the first time in a while.

The belt was on the 4th notch.

Slow and steady. That’s what has worked for me.

Being conscious of what is actual hunger. No real cokes. #yayfordietgreencoke

Water. Intermittent fasting.

Oh & running with my cheerleaders.

Is this fasting every day? Nope. Do I eat pizza sometimes? Oh yes. Rolls? Every Sunday. McDonald’s? Omg the fries. Wendy’s? I’ll take a #10 with extra bbq sauce packets for my fries.

{BUT I am conscious of not eating fast food all the time and when I do it is usually my only “real” meal of the day and followed by loads of water}

So to those of you who are struggling with this same thing of getting to your happy & healthy weight…

*especially post-baby*

You’ll get there. Be patient with yourself. Have grace with the body you have. Be kind to your system. Know that it takes time to have a long-term outcome.

Why do I care? I care because I want my girls to see a healthy momma and that Momma chooses to be healthy {majority of the time} in her choices, portions, and size.

I don’t want daughters who think I need to be a stick figure. I want daughters who know Momma is ok with her battle scars of pregnancy, but still chooses to reach her healthy weight and maintain it.

I want daughters who know Momma has had the same belt since 7th grade.

Momma has used all the notches on that belt at different stages of life.

Momma plans to keep the belt.

Momma is a little attached to that old belt.

And Momma is ok with it.

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